


The Oven Krampus

by SwordLiger



Category: Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six (Video Games)
Genre: Christmas, Christmas Party, Cooking, Friendship, Gen, KFC, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Siegemas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-22
Updated: 2018-12-22
Packaged: 2019-09-25 01:01:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,714
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17111480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SwordLiger/pseuds/SwordLiger
Summary: Day 22 of Siegemas: "Who the hell turned off the oven?"





	The Oven Krampus

Christmas time. A mixed bag of a season for all of Rainbow. All celebrated in their own ways, the Americans loved being the ones to string the tree and base with lights. The Canadians shot their sting of firecrackers and the Japanese couldn’t resist the big bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken. This was more of a joke to them, and everyone on base, but still a great way to bring everyone together. The Germans however prefered the ‘darker’ side of the holiday. The squadron dressed as the traditional Krampus and his ghouls, occasionally tormenting their fellows ops when they least expected it. Grabbing a single member of Rainbow by their wrist and ankles, chanting ‘Naughty’ as they hoisted them away, which all ended with a burst of laughter from the rest of the base.

Though much to everyone’s delight, the Germans also agreed to making the dinner this year, but not without a side dish from every team and at least one large pail of KFC. Most were eager to try the various fowl and hunks of meat the team would prepare as well as the much anticipated desserts. 

IQ spent most of her night and early morning working alone to get all the baking done. She worked in the near silent company of a quiet radio that played various Christmas tunes. Humming along to a few, she was able to lose track of time to distract from her eerie silence of the base. 

“Something smells amazing in here.” A low, gravelly voice chimed from the open space of the canteen.

Pulled from her baking trance, Monika shot her head up to see Jackal walking towards her, a mug of something warm in his hand. “Thanks. Couldn’t sleep I take it?”

Jackal shook his head, “I actually was able to get a few hours, but woke up and couldn’t fall asleep again. Figured, it’s already Christmas better to stay awake.” He took a sip from his still piping hot drink before release a yawn. “Need any help?”

IQ pondered for a second as she went over her mental checklist, “No, I think I have most of it. But if you are desperate to keep your hands busy, you could ice the bundt cake over there.” She motioned with her head to a rather sizeable brown cake that, in its current state, didn’t look as flashy as the other pastries lined up next to it. “I warmed up a small batch of icing. Should be in the microwave.” She never once directly pointed to anything as her hands kept preoccupied with mixing and stirring. 

Jackal walked over the microwave and grabbed the small bowl placed inside, barely still warm from its preheating. “Who taught you how to bake?”

“My mom and meine Tante. I mean my aunt.” She replied swiftly as her time spent with Jackal was scarce and conversation was a bit odd.

Jackal chuckled, “I know it’s hard to not switch between languages. I still struggle with it myself. Mira is worse than I about it.” Grabbing a spoon, he used it to remix the handmade icing before lightly pouring it. “Did you ever think to do something along the lines of baking instead of becoming a militant?”

Monika sighed, “No. It was a little too tedious for me. Besides, tech had my interest way more than sweets.” She gave a light-hearted scoff, “I know my mother would have loved for me to do something less dangerous than this but I’m not the type to take things slow. Living everyday knowing how it’s going to happen is not a lifestyle I think I could ever live.”

Nodding in agreement, Jackal couldn’t deny the words as this was no doubt how most at Rainbow felt. “If you feel that way now, highly doubt it will change once you get to my age.” 

The two continued to chat, about life experiences, from moments in Rainbow to the old days of their school days. Minutes faded to hours as the duo finished up the last of the desserts, just in time to see the sun rise. 

“So who is Krampus coming for this year?” Ryad inquired as he very much enjoyed the spectacle, only because he had yet to be chosen.

“Bandit is suggesting either Thatcher or Lion. After that whole fight they had, he feels it only right to get one. I feel we should get both honestly. Plus it would catch them both by surprise.” Monika giggled as she placed the last of the sweets into the fridge. “You can’t tell anyone though, okay?”

“Understood. Well, I guess a hour or two of sleep wouldn’t hurt.”

“Agreed. Plus Blitz and Bandit still have to get to cooking all of the meats for tonight. And no one starts the ‘party’ until after briefing.” IQ added as she walked out of the canteen towards the barracks. “Well, I’m going to take those two hours of sleep. See you later today, Ryad.”

“Sleep well, Monika.”

* * *

 

Noon struck over the base, most of the base was awake, IQ being the only one not at briefing as she caught up on her sleep. Six didn't say anything thankfully, even if she did Blitz would cover for Monika. And much to everyone's surprise, the terrorist activity was at an all time low.

With the briefing over, Bandit and Blitz made their way to the kitchen to begin roasting and grilling the assortment of meats. Ash tagged along as she was hell bent on making her ‘signature’ mashed potatoes. 

Half of the ops made their way to the canteen, eager to begin enjoying the small finger food and assortment of chips and dips meant to only sate their appetites until dinner. The other half scurried to other parts of the base to resume their day to day routines. The conversations began to flare up making the room settle into a dull roar that was backed by Christmas songs and jingles. Many sipped on the ‘punch’ Thermite made that was nothing more than Fruit Punch flavored Kool-Aid with a little too much sugar. But no one could complain, a Christmas spent on the base was better than one in a broken down warehouse.

Laughter filled the hall, stories of childhood Christmas gift and gag gifts brought the room together. The smell of a roasted duck began to fill the air only to be conquered by the smell of a roast of some type of beef.

As time drudged on, stomachs could be heard growling as the small finger sized snacks could only do so much to sate appetites. Many began to heckle the two Germans, teasing for them to pick up the pace. To which they were met with a middle finger from Bandit.

“I'm surprised Monika is still asleep.” Bandit commented as he scanned the crowd again.

“Well she did stay up until six in the morning making all of the sweets.” Blitz replied as he finished wrapping up the bone-in ham. “Don't fret. She'll be ready for Krampus. If that's what you are worried about.”

As if on cue, IQ walked into the mess hall. A warm, and rather large, greeting echoed throughout the room. She smiled softly and walked over to Jäger who gave her a quick half hug. He was quick to offer her a cup of the ‘horrid’ drink and a few small snacks, to which she only took the drink.

Everyone continued on with their mingling. Resuming their jokes and pulling out the old forgotten dart board to help pass the time.

* * *

 

The sun lowered in the sky, much of the food was fully prepared and the tables began to be set. Everyone was eager to finally eat a full meal, so the preparations of side dishes was quick to be made. Blitz called out to let those listening that the ham was only an hour away from being ready. A small collection of groans were the response.

“Can't we just eat what we have and save that for later? I'm tired of waiting.” Fuze barked, as he leaned against the wall.

The few other operators that remained in the canteen nodded and spoke quietly in agreement. They grew tired of the waiting and vocalized their thanks for even the tiniest bit of holiday dinner they could muster together. 

“Fine, fine.” Blitz chuckled before checking to make sure they would have enough meat to satisfy everyone. “We can go ahead and get started.”

A small waves of cheers and claps rang through the hall. Thermite and Pulse grabbed the better drinks on base, which was anything besides the ‘fruit punch’, and the less jaded cutlery. Setting them out at ever plate, the two ensured everyone got at least a knife and fork.

As the two finish setting out the silverware, Castle stood up, “I’ll round everyone else up.” he spoke softly to just those within earshot before he walked off to find those wandering the base.

Within minutes, one by one all began to return to the dining hall. Their once drained and hungry expressions replaced by ones of joy and excitement for decent meals. Bandit and Blitz brought the main dishes, setting them on the table; heaps of side dishes followed behind, carried by Ash, Pulse and Mira. And of course Echo and Hibana’s three giant pails of fried chicken.

As everyone sat in their spots, J ä ger was the last to file in. He trotted into the kitchen to grab one last bowl of green beans per Ash’s request. Turning to walk out of the doorway, a small red light caught his attention. “Hey guys does this still need to be on?” He called out. He waited for an answer before checking to ensure nothing was inside. Empty. He turned the dial, shutting off it off. Taking a seat next to IQ, he was hit with a wave of nostalgia. The sight of the food took him back to his carefree childhood, as he was sure it did for many others at the tables.

“Wait, wait everyone.” Ash spoke loudly, hashing the room and halted those filling their plates. “Before we dig in, should we say a small thank you to the universe for being kind to us this year?”

“Yeah. Thanks you cruel bastard, for not putting me in a position that might get me shot this year.” Kapkan’s quick words earned laughs from nearly everyone. “Let's eat!” Another round of laughs echoed through the hall before everyone resumed where they left off.

For the first time in a long time, the operators of Rainbow lowered their guards. They laughed, they toasted to ridiculous calls and of course questioned why KFC. 

Bandit stood from his chair and walked back to the kitchen, checking in on the almost forgotten ham. “Wait, what?”

Noticing Bandit’s fevered movements, J ä ger walked back into the simple kitchen to clearly angered Dominic. “Hey, what's wrong?”

“Who the hell turned off the oven?!” Bandit’s words didn’t come out as shout, but still loud enough to catch more than J ä ger’s ears. 

“The oven? It’s empty. Why would we need it on?”

Pointing to the over J ä ger checked, Bandit spoke, “That one is empty. This one has the ham! Did you turn it off?!”

“Yeah, I’m sorry. I thought that was the switch to other one! Can't you just turn it back on?” J ä ger questioned, his nerves beginning to rise.

“No you can’t ‘just turn it back on’.” The canteen began to hush as the two men began a small shouting match. “You’re supposed to be smart! You couldn’t think to check the other one?” Bandit growled as he continued to interrogate Marius.

“Fuck you, Dominic!” The room fell silent as the normally calm pilot could be easily heard across the room. “I said I was sorry! It was a simple mistake, don't act like you don't make those.” Bandit said nothing as J ä ger roared back at him. They engaged in an intense staring match before Marius stormed out of the kitchen and headed back towards the barracks.

Blitz stood up to follow Marius but was stopped by IQ. “I'll handle this one. If I need you I'll come get you.”

Monika followed after Jäger who had already made it back to their barracks. She slowly opened the door to the bunks. J ä ger sat on the edge of his bed. His head hung low as he rubbed his fingers. “He's such an asshole.” He spoke to Monika without turning to face her.

“What makes you say that?” She teased as she walked over to him, taking a seat on the right of him.

“If that is you attempt at making me feel better. I give it a zero.”  His head lowered more, a small attempt to hide his expression from IQ, “I feel like I ruined everything.”

“No you didn’t. We had so much more to eat than a precooked ham that just needed heating. One little thing wasn't going to ruin anything.” IQ raised her hand and ran her fingers through his hair. She grabbed a small lock by his ear and teased it through her fingers. J ä ger stopped the aggressive rubbing of his hand letting his hands dangle between his knees. She sighed softly as he continued to calm down. “You know how Dom can get. He’s got a lot of anger issues. He just made a mountain out of a molehill. And by now you should know to not let what he says get to you.”

“I know. And I don’t. It’s more the fact that he blew up over something so trivial in front of everyone else.” He turned his head to face her, “Between us, it’s fine that he yells at me. But when he does with others around I feel like he is going for the jugular.” 

“Don’t worry. He’ll get what’s coming to him.” Monika patted her friend’s back, “Actually, I've got a proposition. Krampus still has to make a visit.”

“I don't want to be near him and try to be cheery right now.” Jäger almost growled his words.

“Fret not. I'll just need to ask a certain someone for their help and we will teach Bandit a lesson. Just get the suits ready and we'll have a little fun.” Monika flashed Marius a devilish smile. “Trust me on this.” Marius gave a small nod to IQ’s little idea.

* * *

 

Everyone quietly chatted in the mess hall, curious as to why Monika came back and pulled Blitz and Jackal. They began to wonder how much Jäger was hurt by Bandit’s words. No one dared to go check on them, the tension in the room was still awfully thick.

The faint sound of a bell could be heard down the long, dark hallway. Then more bells began to rattle, breaking the hard silence in the room. A clawed hand wrapped around the corner as a hooded figure draped in tattered clothing peeked out of the corner. 

Bandit went wide eyed as he recognized the outfit as one of the ‘imps’. His bewilderment rose as he questioned why they started this without him. Soon two more imps emerged followed by a tall, daunting Krampus who scanned the crowd, all of whom held their breath to see if they were to be picked or not. A hand rose and pointed directly at Bandit.

“What?!” He sprang up as the three shorter figures ran over to Dominic and wrestled him to the ground. 

Krampus walked through the crowd of giggling ops, most of whom seemed surprised at Krampus’s choice for who had been naughty. “Naughty. Naughty.” The room erupted into laughter as the four creatures grabbed hold of a fighting Bandit. 

“What the hell?!” Bandit roared. “Let me go!”

They took a few steps before all beginning to chant ‘Oven. Oven. Oven.’ causing the room to howl even louder.

“Guess Jäger got his revenge rather quick on that one.” Ash commented in between her bursts of laughter. 

Thermite nodded as he wiped away a small tear from his eye, “Hell yeah he did. But who is the fourth since they took Bandit?”

“Jackal.” Mira smirked confidently. “He can't hide that Spanish drawl from me.”

**Author's Note:**

> Apologies for any errors. I will get to them eventually.


End file.
